I'd like to say that it's not any deeper than trying to one up Lea, but if anyone would know that's not it, it's you.
[Only it was less doing—and more Riku thinking he had it handled. It was arrogant and a little cocky, drawn up feelings that he acted upon so he could convince himself it was fine.]
[ at least, not about these things. though between the two of them, riku's probably gotten better at it over time. there's something not quite like jealousy, not quite like envy, that clings to him; some leftover bitterness and resentment at seeing the kind of growth he never had. the kind of growth that maybe he never will have. ]
i just thought you'd have grown out of that competitive streak
Edited (i thought there would be but there really wasn't akjsldf) 2019-02-18 11:16 (UTC)
[Talking is definitely not their strong suit. Riku wonders if this is easier or harder. What things he can evade he can't, and what things he shouldn't evade he also can't just do. He remembers his frustration in coming across the Replica in the first place. It wasn't easy seeing all that nastiness on display, and he hadn't exactly been fair to him.]
Only when it doesn't matter.
[And frankly, this doesn't matter, unless it keeps happening. One thing's for sure: it won't.]
We both know just how hard it is to do things differently. You don't just wake up one day and stop thinking that way. And it gets harder once your thinking's messed up.
[Not that Lea would've known that. Take away the chokehold that Riku has on his self control, and a lot of mistakes could easily happen. That's what following his heart really means: not letting his mind and thoughts get away from him.]
Sometimes, it's trusting that it's okay if you did mess up, too. Sora knows that better than anyone.
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replicates
I'd like to say that it's not any deeper than trying to one up Lea, but if anyone would know that's not it, it's you.
[Only it was less doing—and more Riku thinking he had it handled. It was arrogant and a little cocky, drawn up feelings that he acted upon so he could convince himself it was fine.]
Not that it makes it any easier to talk about.
no subject
[ at least, not about these things. though between the two of them, riku's probably gotten better at it over time. there's something not quite like jealousy, not quite like envy, that clings to him; some leftover bitterness and resentment at seeing the kind of growth he never had. the kind of growth that maybe he never will have. ]
i just thought you'd have grown out of that competitive streak
no subject
Only when it doesn't matter.
[And frankly, this doesn't matter, unless it keeps happening. One thing's for sure: it won't.]
We both know just how hard it is to do things differently. You don't just wake up one day and stop thinking that way. And it gets harder once your thinking's messed up.
[Not that Lea would've known that. Take away the chokehold that Riku has on his self control, and a lot of mistakes could easily happen. That's what following his heart really means: not letting his mind and thoughts get away from him.]
Sometimes, it's trusting that it's okay if you did mess up, too. Sora knows that better than anyone.